A word from Drago

Here is a letter I received as a comment from a guy called Drago, who is a reader of the blog. Thought I’d tidy it up a bit and post it here as a blog.

I have been thinking about the lobby to legalise maryjuana in Canada. And based on my extensive research, I have concluded thatĀ legalisationĀ is inevitable. More and more of our best and brightest, in the universities are experimenting with pot, and finding it harmless. The common sentiment is that pot alleviates stress, helps with loss of appetite, and with the intraocular pressure which results in glaucoma.
In this particular application, pot is being found to be a workable alternative to the installation of an ocular shunt. A medical procedure which allows intraocular fluid to drain from the eye, through a small tube.
Or health care system must embrace organic alternatives. They are at the door, and certainly worthy of consideration and review. Yet our laws and social mores are considerably narrow in scope, and clumsy in application.
My review of the efforts of the proponents of legalisation has shown a few shortfalls in their collective efforts, in particular, and their socio-political profile in general. Clearly, legislators and the public, are not persuaded to consider a worthy deference to these dedicated crusaders of social development. The emphasis on legalisation is ever stifled with the spectre of “recreational use”. This “focus” generally stifles an intelligent and informed review of all the facts. Generally too few facts are taken into consideration by the public, and legislators. Too much emphasis on “use for pleasure” has misbalanced the debate from a faculty of enlightened review. Part of the problem stems from a very naive approach on the part of the proponents of legalisation. they do not present an argument which would command a certain respect from the parties which oppose them. The opposition is a savvy collection of business people and lawyers in government, highly educated, highly capable, and highly competitive. And certainly adept at the classic repate of negotiation and debate.
I am writing this letter in order to solicit funding for a strategic review committee. I have worked out the essential planks of a new PR platform and an overall negotiation strategy. I have considered the problem thoroughly, and have isolated one instrumental flaw in the approach.
Lawyers and business people expect negotiators to have an itemised agenda of demands, expectations, arguments, and reasonable points of settlement. Succinctly, the classic negotiation strategy employs a very confident and demanding opening move: Ask for much more that you expect to get, in case your opponent is sleepy and unprepared. If you do not do this, you will not be respected as a shrewd negotiator, and by extension, you will not be respected as a capable and serious man. This is the most essential and common ethos of negotiation. Ask for more. And let the opposition talk you down. This “engagement” allows for a lively, and therefore committed debate, and the satisfaction of a hard won settlement.
The instrumental plank in my platform is unabashedly demanding for this reason. And for the same reason, stands a high chance of victory. It is realistic in terms of the general framework of arbitration strategies.
I am demanding much more than legalisation. I want pot to be mandatory. Mandatory for everyone above the age of 18. Pot should be in the water and in the air that we breathe. It should be in the food we eat, and in the fuel which propels our vehicles and heats our homes. It should be in people’s underwear and socks, as a sturdy insulation against this horrible Canadian winter. Pot should be grown ornamentally around the UN Building in New York, as a statement of purpose and mission. It should be mandatory among all people serving in the military. Especially the one’s who prefer RUSH.
I see a day when we will be writing on pot paper and wearing pot shirts.
I see a day when a man or woman will not be judged by the colour of their skin, the ethos of their creed, the content of their character, but by the quality of Cush which they provide at social gatherings. I see a day when there will be a pot leaf on every mirror, and on every bumper sticker. I see a day when hemp diapers will be saving the planet from disposable brands. Tragic deaths of dogs and wildlife will be alleviated by 98 percent from disposable diaper ingestion. If we achieve only this, we will have a considerable victory. I envision a day when the Rastafarian will have the same social credibility as a colonel in the Salvation Army. I see a day when the hippie creed will enlighten the droll and colourless into broad vistas of transcendental joy. I shall greet the day when boy scouts will reforest clear-cut swaths of our blessed wilderness with multitudes of Indicas and Sativas and that ever-evasive Cush. I see a day when parliament will be opened in the name of her royal majesty and proceed with the lighting of the bong. And will continue with debates on the meaning of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Capital hill in America will be awash in the delicious treats of Krispy Kreme. People will greet each other with a knowing nod, and “hooking up” will be the standard of social conciousness.
At this point, I believe, the opposition should be invited to partake. Here they will be riveted into a logical quandary. Either admit they do not know what they are talking about, or smoke up and join the party. Nevertheless they will be sufficiently disarmed and glowing with respect for the approach. “That’s what we want to hear”, they will say, and nod and smile. “It is good to discuss these things with a man of capability and understanding. “There is strength and dedication in your ranks”, “and we respect you as warriors”.” Live and let live”, they will say. “The smokers of the herb are focused and full of joy, and their celebration of consciousness has enlivened our multitudes, surely we shall rock on”….
In order to achieve all this, I need cash. Lots and lots of chash. As much as Guy Caballero could ever want or need. Lobbying is expensive. Booze and Prostitutes are eminently expensive. And plying the will of the political elite has never been a cheap proposition. It is a monumental undertaking and will require mountains of money. Your contributions will be tax deductible after the legislation has been changed. And all surpluses will be cheerfully refunded, in product.
Demand pot to be mandatory, and settle for legalisation.